poshxspice:

subject13fringe:

montypythonandtheholyblog:

today I learned that if you want to slash someone’s tires, don’t slash all four; only slash three because if you slash all four their insurance will pay for it but if you only slash three they have to pay for it all out of pocket 

image

today on satan makes a blog post

(via sniffing)

Watching A Goofy Movie As A Kid: Hahahaha oh man, poor Max, that's the most embarrassing dad ever

Watching A Goofy Movie As An Adult: YOU STUPID BRAT YOU SHOULD APPRECIATE YOUR GODDAMN TREASURE OF A FATHER

richwhitemom:

I’m ugly as hell why do you see me as cute I’m not cute I’m ugly that’s why I always get replaced or they find someone better than me

(via handjob)

perfunctory:

it’s so cute when you talk to someone a lot and then you notice the little phrases that you use and the stupid little things you say slipping into their vocabulary more and more

(via worsting)